Or, can we just pretend that yesterday never happened?
Yowzers, I was doing pretty good all day, for a Monday. I lent an ear to this person and another to that person and then to this person again, and added my two cents when appropriate. I digressed only once or twice (far less than usual) (but they were doozies), going off on related tangents that became wild hairs, eventually (some time and maybe a few subjects later) getting back 'round to the point prior to departure. You know.
I don't think I was feeling smug -- in fact, it felt really good to listen and be a good friend -- I just mostly didn't have anything much to complain about. Or maybe I'm all complained out. That's a good thing?
Deserved or not, the slap-down occurred right around suppertime. Well, right around the time I'd normally eat supper -- if I wasn't going to school after work instead. I didn't even have a class, but I get so damned little done at home with all the distractions that I thought I'd go work on my big project in the lab at school for a while. Not that there aren't distractions there (it's just the normal noises in here), but I thought, surrounded by all the other studious students, that I'd be less likely to stray. And I was. Less likely. I did not stray. I put my head down and got to work.
A classmate came in and sat down next to me and we contemplated a question/discussion that we'd briefly touched on last week about whether our big project is supposed to be only a presentation OR a presentation and a report. Somehow, I got the idea that this project used to be only a report, but that the requirement had changed and it was now only a presentation. Well, we inquired and -- I'm sure you already see how this turns out -- the new requirement is for both a report and presentation. I've been working for the past couple of weeks on distilling information from a zillion different sources into a concise presentation (believe me, that is very taxing, very hard work!), when all along I could have been foaming at the fingertips, writing a report -- I'm good at that!
Well, the wind went right out of my sails -- it didn't help that I hadn't had the aforementioned supper and maybe my brainpower wasn't so good -- so I packed up my zip drive and left. I called DH and whined a little and he offered to make me supper, and I was able to think and regroup on the way home. I got started before dinner even hit the table and worked until about 11:00 last night, with later fortification in the way of some leftover candy corn and a few Special Dark chocolate chips. I realized that I was actually doing okay, I was just going down the wrong track, so now I'm on the right track(s) and have built a little head of steam, and I'm trying not to think (at the moment) about the larger disgruntlements and questions (Why am I doing this? Where is this going to take me? How am I going to get this other stuff done? What else am I forgetting?). I think the other poor woman thought I was pissed at HER, so I sent an email later to apologize for leaving in such a huff. Turns out the computer lab was only open until 6:00 last night, anyway.
Harumph. I'm pulling it together. The little engine that could. ; )