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09 February 2007

Inevitability

Dsc09702It's inevitable that I'll show my progress and milk my mitten(s) for all they've got from beginning to end.  So far, I've managed to refrain from posting a picture-a-day and have kept it to a picture-every-other-day.  Here's the hastily donned mitten for a one-handed morning photo in bad light (I can't wait 'til the sun starts to rise before I do).  The first pattern repeat is complete and there's a bit of red waste yarn in there holding the spot for the thumb.  This will be the right-hand mitten, though it is being modeled on my left.  A one-handed morning photo in bad light taken with the left hand (my left hand) would not be good.

Knitting time was curtailed last night because of the inevitable trip with Katie to buy a battery for her car -- which has been a lame duck since Monday, except for a miraculous 20 minutes on Wednesday afternoon, the inevitable last gasp.

Also, Madeleine requested the inevitable trip to Target when I picked her up from work and I can hardly deny her (though I can huff and puff a little and be a tiny bit grumpy because... well, just because...).  That happens about once a week and she really doesn't ask for much, really doesn't ask me for much.  I didn't have to venture too far into the store, and was able to pick up a couple of necessities.  I did miss all of Grey's, though.  Yes, I know they've been rebroadcasting on Friday nights, but I was sure that the one time I counted on that re-broadcast, they'd find something else to show.  Happily, I'm wrong.

It was inevitable that I'd hear from my uncle about inevitability.  His wife is dying, the slope of decline is quite slippery and steep now.  It breaks my heart.  There's never been an abundance of warm fuzzies between us -- they've been married for over 20 years and, still, I'm uneasy thinking of her or referring to her as "aunt" -- we've always gotten along okay, but our lives are very different.  She's very smart and educated, scientific and factual, goal-oriented and motivated, forthright -- no time for tiptoeing around or "wasting time," no sense prolonging the inevitable.  But nothing matters, not a single, solitary thing, except that my uncle loves her.  And she's dying. They're doing their best to get through it, accept it, let go.  Inevitability.

This, and other stuff, contributes to my current and probably inevitable feeling of bleh for the blog.  The mitten's great, the sweater (even with issues) is great, all the yarn I have for all the other projects... is great.  My blog buds?  They're so great.  (My guilt at the mountain of unanswered email and comments?  That's not so great.  Can you feel my brain waves when I read them?  How much I love and appreciate them?)  My new Interweave Knits?  It's great.  VK can't be much deeper in the mailbag.  And it will soon be Spring!  (Don't burst my bubble, I'll do it on my own soon enough.)  I'm feeling scrutinized and wary, happy and sad, strong and insecure, laid bare and yet withholding so much.  So very much.

Yeah, so bare (oops, little slip there) bear with me.  I think I need to take a little time, take care of myself.

Comments

The blahs of February - well lessee - do you have a holiday on Monday? more knitting time- or for a special treat?

You don't need to answer...we do know you're there reading and that you know we're here if you need us. It's been a tough winter for you with the ups and downs of life. That means you need to care for yourself most of all.
Your mitten is enviable! I just might need to try that pattern instead of Miamu's that I have in mind. I should start this weekend or early in the week!

Holy crap, that's gorgeous.

I have to tell you, though, your title gave me a scare. At first I thought you were going to say inevitably something has gone wrong with the mitten. But worse than that, one of the professors in the classes I am doing now overuses the word "inevitably." It's at least every other phrase. And much of the time it is used wrong. One of these nights I am going to scream out, "It's NOT inevitable..." you mean .....something else. He just uses that word as a filler, and he 99% of the time does NOT mean "inevitably"! EEEEEk. Should I direct him to my pissed-off post? ;)

Lovely mittens!

I feel so sorry for your uncle! It's hard to be losing the one you love.

Perhaps my contest will help with your blahs? http://noricum.blogspot.com/2007/02/birthday-contest.html

If I was knitting a mitten like that I'd show at least a picture every day, maybe more. You should be very very proud. As for the inevitables, it's inevitable that I'll be your friend through thick and thin.

The mitten is worthy of a post every day. It is YOUR blog after all. If the mitten moves you, go with it.

Always take care of yourself first. You can't help others unless you help yourself. (okay, that sounds very cliche even if it is true)

Don't worry about responding to every comment and email.

Hugs to you and your Uncle.

I think we all know you appreciate our comments and thoughts, that should be the last thing you worry about, really.

I love the progress shots of the mitten, your progress is making me want to start my own mittens so I too can be productive.

Been there. Take all the time you need.

Your gauge is absolutely perfect!

Don't feel like you have to respond to this, I know the feeling.

I might get 2 or 3 comments a post and for some reason I still have a hard time hitting the "reply" button.

It may only have 28 days, but February is the longest month of the year, by far!

By all means take care of yourself. We'd do it for ya but it's hard to stretch our arms through all those tubey things :-)

And don't you dare reply. No stress.

Sending you a hug from the Crescent City, sweetie.

Post what you wanna post! I'll enjoy every picture you put up there, even if it's daily, I promise - 'cause that mitten is drop-dead gorgeous.

Funny - I never expect a response to a comment unless I specifically ask a question. Please don't feel obligated - that would make it a drudgery.

I do like those mittens - a pic per day would be fine by me! if you do feel the need to answer this one, then I'd love to know how the braids are done please (no pressure, honest!)

I'm feeling bleh for the blog too. I wonder if it's a three year thing - kinda like the seven year itch?

hang in there sister, your blehs will give way soon enough ..... I will keep you and the family in my thoughts

lovely lovely mittens. and as for being good to yourself, definitely do it!
fortunately blog-blahs pass after a little while.

Ditto what everyone before me said. Love the mittens--post a photo of them twice a day (or not) and I'll be happy. Take a break, hug yourself, your blog buddies will still be out here. Virtual hugs to you, Vicki.

Take all the time you need and an enormous hug to you. (BTW, the mitten is so gorgeous. Drool. Drool. Drool.)

You may not realize how much love you always project through your blog, for your daughters, and right now for your uncle. Hang in there.. it's the bleggie time of winter. I think you should jump right into Mitten Cam format and let that cover it til inspiration returns.

Your mitten is soooo gorgeous, I'd be trying it on every few rounds too if it were mine. Your patterns on your 100 things are adorable, I love the coat and apron/pinafore. Take your time and take care of yourself, we'll still be here when you get back.

I love your mitten, Vicki. I'm jealous, in fact (in a good way!). I went to the yarn store in Appleton on Friday -- it was great! Thank you so much for the recommendation. Even the gal who was with me -- who is not a knittter -- had fun. Please take gentle care of yourself and your family.

Although I read you everytime you post, and enjoy your posts as much or more than almost all of the other blogs I read, it was inevitable that I comment to this one. I know the deal. My knitting is good, my life is good, I'm excercising and hanging out and doing stuff and all. The blogging? Meh. I'm trying. Trying to read, trying to post.

I love the mitten still. In love. The only thing that might make me love it more, is, well you can probably guess. And if it was for me.

Thinking of you much, and hoping that life is going along.

I'm sorry to hear about your uncle and his wife :(

On the happy side? Your mitten is gorgeous and an inspiration. :)

I've had the blog bleh's too.............will be thinking of you during your time out.
I'm hoping that inevitably, you'll be back soon.

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