I have posted more pictures of myself on this blog in the past month or so than I have in all the time since I started blogging, so I really need not post a "before" picture here, then. Do stay tuned for the "after." Kate made back-to-back appointments at the hair salon for us today, and I have no idea what's going to transpire in that chair. But first, there's...
Unfinished Business (please see the Nov. 6th post if you're not sure why we're on question 39.)
39. IF YOU DIDN'T MAKE THE DECISION TO GET MARRIED AND HAVE A FAMILY, WHAT WOULD YOU BE DOING TODAY?
Go ahead, just ask a friend for a random question and see what you get. This one -- not even close to 'What's the last thing you ate?' -- came fully loaded. ; ) I should have specified True or False -- or multiple choice, at least. I've been practically paralyzed, wondering where to begin, or from whence to leap with the extrapolations for this little exercise.
Holy moly. The difficulty begins with "decision." To be perfectly honest, I feel that I've made relatvely few true decisions in my life. I've led mostly a reactionary life -- something happens, make a choice (quick!) -- not so much decisions made (as in taking into consideration, making judgment, coming to a well-thought-out conclusion). The answer to Question 16, "...lack of motivation, drive, passion," plays in well here -- in fact, this is exactly what I was thinking about with that answer. I can most definitely be motivated, I've demonstrated drive, and I'm a Scorpio for Pete's sake -- PASSION is my middle name -- but always on a small scale or very focused, not in terms of "what am I going to do with my life" kind of stuff. I always wished it would come to me like a lightning bolt -- THIS is what I want to do, THIS is what I've been waiting for, THIS is what I was MEANT to do...
If I get past that part, then the question becomes something like, "If you weren't married with children, what would you be doing?" It isn't any easier to answer, given all of the above. I guess I'm not very goal-oriented, always living for today more than tomorrow -- which is evident in my retirement savings thus far (though I have been working on that more these past few years -- so in essence, I am working today for tomorrow, pretty much -- and encouraging even my quite young daughters to NOT do as I did, START EARLY!). When I moved into one of my first apartments, my boyfriend at the time gave me a housewarming gift -- a very practical tool set (the BEST first housewarming gift ever) and a kind of funny card with a 15-year projection calendar -- or something like that -- it was "kind of funny" because I know this particular boyfriend was also quite serious about the future plans and goals and where he wanted to be in five years. I always thought I was doing good if I could project five minutes. Yeah, we had a WHOLE lot of fun together for a while, and it was even this >< close to most serious for a minute, but we really weren't compatible for the long-term. ; )
Anyway, I suppose I could blather on and on and on, but I will make a decision to wind this up. The answer is... I don't know.