I threw out my flowerpot ashtray and broke 12 cigarettes into the trash can last night. Like Ann, I slapped on a patch this morning. Like Ann, I didn't usually have my first cigarette for more than an hour after waking up in the morning. Like Ann, I won't be wearing the patch at night. Like Ann, your emails and comments of support and encouragement are making a HUGE difference in how I feel about all this. I guess I'm a lot like Ann. And that's just fab, because I like Ann!
This is hard, and I'm being tested right off the bat. There's bad, bad news affecting someone close to me (not a relative, but damn close) and I'm taking so many deep breaths this morning that I feel as if I'm in labor.
In my nicotine withdrawal delirium, I actually decided that I am in a labor of sorts; giving birth to a different me. I'm feeling testy now, as I did then, too. I can't help but remember what I
yelled at said to my breathing coach husband, shortly before the birth of our eldest, "Dammit, I know how to breathe!!" And I did. And I am. And I still congratulate myself for not telling him to fuck off, as my sister said to hers. That very same sister, after being very noncommittal, has decided to join in the quit! She got the date mixed up, though, so her morning email began like this: Am I a frickin' day early?? (Notice how she's cleaned up her act since motherhood?) She is the most competitive of my siblings, though, so once she realizes that she'll forever be able to say that she quit before me, she'll be fine.
So, anyway, breathing, breathing, breathing! And now on to brighter things...
Birthday Shoes! Way back on the 4th, I posted about some shoes that Kt was eyeing up for her birthday. They were on sale at anthropologie (item 45182) and when I tried to order them that day, they only had three pair, all size 11. About a week later, Kt sent me an email and said that they had a pair of 8-1/2s (still not her size, but close enough to try) (and she's such a shoe ho' that she was checking back everyday!)! So I ordered 'em and they were in yesterday's mail and they fit and she's just thrilled. They're unusual, they're red, they came with their own fabric bag! Whew, one birthday gift down, two to go.
Also in the mail was something that I referred to all night as my "Knitting Prescription" -- self-prescribed -- the spring Rowan mag and my renewal gift. The yarn is Cork; I don't care for the capelet pattern, am thinking of using it for something for baby. Kt loves everything in the mag and, having just completed everything but the brim of the Newsboy Cap (and the Point 5 commissioned scarf, which was very well received), seems eager to spread her knitting wings further. Shoe ho', yarn snob, that first labor resulted in a lovable monster!
The forecast is for 3 to 7 inches of stupid snow, maybe more, between now and tomorrow afternoon. This is our weekend away! We may have to change our plans a bit. As long as DH & I can get to Green Bay tomorrow (and it's not all that far away), we'll be fine; I'll be happy if all I do is soak in the whirlpool, knit, read, and have my massage on Sunday morning.
Sunday is my first blogiversary! It's been an incredible year, 290 posts in 365 days, innumerable new "friends." My first comments came on April 1st and can you guess who left them? Kathaleenie and Ann. That's just so cool.
On Monday, I'll be answering Terby's Blog-a-Thon questions, which seems like a good way to kick off a new year. I have to answer one of her questions right now, though, unofficial and off the record: What song are you secretly singing to yourself? Well, this one (between giggles).